I don't know if you read MckMama's blog or not, but she did a really good post (http://www.mycharmingkids.net/2010/01/im-gonna-miss-this.html) the other day about being in the midst of the chaos of raising children and wondering how you will ever make it through, but then realizing that one day she will miss it. It brought a huge amount of guilt right now along with tears. There are many days when we are stuck in the house and I get antsy and think, "I can't wait until they are older and we can get out and do more stuff. It's so hard right now." I have also been going back and making a Creative Memories Storybook for myself since I plan on giving the girls' scrapbooks to them when they leave the house a million years from now. As I'm going through all of their pictures, I am amazed at my beautiful babies and I can't even seem to remember so much of the first year. Partly because maybe I have a bad memory (although it's actually fairly good), partly because I had twins and there was so much to do, and partly because I just think that it goes so fast. I'm looking back at babies who were laying on their bellies because they couldn't go anywhere else, but now I have two toddlers that I can't even keep still if I tried. Sometimes I think that I miss out on things because I'm bored or tired and I want to rush to the next stage in life.
I don't want to be that woman or mom. I pray often for just being content and enjoying the stage that Hannah and Kate are at. It's difficult and busy, but I don't want to miss it. I'm trying not to cry right now just thinking about it. I already do miss those newborn days (I know there are probably some of you who have newborns who are thinking I'm crazy) and those that are thinking, "Well, just have another one." To those of you who are thinking the latter, my response is this, "When I can afford a minivan and Hannah & Kate are more independent, we will. In due time."
We are battling colds in the house (except for me) and we can't do much that puts the girls in contact with other kids. So, in light of wanting to make those most of our time, I decided that after our trip to Target today we would play outside. The weather is beautiful in Florida today. I laid out some blankets and set up their play yard and we played outside for about 30 minutes. This was really the first time that the girls got to "play" in the grass. We all had lots of fun! Here are some pictures: